So it finally happened. Running made me cry. Physical tears. Tears which I couldn’t stop.
After 11 miles, 10 of which were fine, I finally broke down. As I hit mile 10 I felt completely drained. Like drained to the point where I didn’t think I could hold myself up never mind run anymore. That last mile was the toughest mile I think I have ever ran and when I turned the corner to see my partner waiting at my front door with recovery drink and protein bar in hand, and I crossed the invisible finish line at my door, I burst into tears.
Exhaustion, frustration, pride, relief. I’m not 100% sure what the tears were for. Perhaps a combination of all those feelings and the realisation that the biggest race of my life so far was only 3 weeks away. The one thing I have been aiming for for the entire year.
During all those months of not being able to walk never mind run, this race was my end goal.
After calming myself down and letting the tears subside I felt proud that I’d completed my furthest run yet, but scared that come mile 10 my body seems to shut down. I definitely feel like it’s a physical thing but my partner has questioned whether this was just that wall that all these runners talk about. Either way I need to kick through this as the Great North Run is 13.1 miles not 10!
After talking to a few people on Twitter I’ve came up with a game plan to tackle 13 miles this weekend – the last long run before the big race! I had been refuelling each hour with a gel but I’m going to refuel also when I hit mile 10 to give me that last kick of energy I seem to desperately need!
I’m still feeling good about my training as I’ve been getting the miles in, even when I don’t want to, even when a run is the last thing I want to do. So now that running has resorted me to crying, am I a “real runner” now?