If you didn’t realise form my Tweeting and Instagramming this week, Wednesday was my birthday. Now usually birthdays to me are a day that revolves around me; a day in which I can behave like the princess that I think I am without anyone telling me to stop being a diva. Obviously the day did go along those lines, but this year was more special to me as it was a day to reflect on how far I have come in my health gain and weight loss journey. I didn’t actually start my new healthy lifestyle until the end of June last year but I thought I would still celebrate my success on my birthday by wearing the same dress I wore the year before, but with a completely different body underneath.
I thought that by wearing the same dress I would be able to see the changes in my body more clearly and I think the picture above shows very well how far I have come, but also how far I have left to go. If you know me and read my blog regularly then you will know that I don’t weight myself as I have an unhealthy relationship with the scales, but mark my progress through inches lost. I still have fat to lose and muscle to gain, and would say that I am 2/3 of the way through my health gain journey.
The past year has been a year of change for me; moving across the country, moving away from my boyfriend (thankfully we’re back in the same apartment again), getting a new job, new body and new lifestyle. The past year has also been an empowering one for me. My weight used to be a very sensitive subject for me and even when I was at my thinnest I was never body confident, and this grew to whole new levels of awful when I gained weight at university. When I went to university I essentially lost control of my body and will power. My confidence took a massive knock but I would still smile my way through it and kid myself that I didn’t look too bad. I now know that wasn’t the truth.
This year has been the year when I have gained back control of my body! This past year I have learnt that a healthy lifestyle can be tough to learn and master, I still have slip ups. I have learnt that my body is capable of so much more than I thought it was. I’ve learnt how to push myself, when to be proud but when to not over do it. Even though my body is not yet where I want it to be I am starting to love it again and can look in a mirror and feel proud, not disgusted.
So one year on I look at the picture above and feel proud. I look in the mirror and see a smile not a look of disgust. I am now 24 years old and for once in my life I am feeling more body confident, and to me this is the best birthday present I can give to myself.